Your aspiration to become a mother can be fulfilled by the surrogacy procedure. You will feel the greatest joy in the world, once you bring the baby home. Your entire journey of surrogacy has achieved a highly-anticipated completion and has shaped your life in the way that you have long desired.

It is important for the intended parents to prepare themselves for parenthood as the baby develops inside the surrogate’s womb. There is no difference in the process of raising the child born out of surrogacy than naturally conceived ones. However, certain factors are to be considered as you transit from being a couple to being parents. We have discussed in this article about the things you need to educate yourself on while raising your surrogate-born child.

Being parents of a child born out of surrogacy, you have to take care of many additional things like legal documentation, financial arrangements, medical urgencies and social challenges. It is required for the intended parents to get involved into the process of surrogacy to identify themselves as the child’s parents.

It is important for the intended parents to get acquainted with the world of surrogacy and prepare themselves before they bring their new baby home. Here are the things that they can do:

Read Books and Articles

There are numerous books on surrogacy and parenting. Intended parents can collect those books and read during the surrogate’s gestational period. This will help them prepare to welcome the baby as the surrogate delivers it to them. There are also many articles and blogs on the internet on new-born care and parenting. They can browse through the internet and read as many of them possible to have a clear idea of parenting.

Parenting Classes

Intended parents should keep in touch with the family services office, local Schools, and paediatricians to know about the various parenting classes. They can get a lot of resources in these parenting classes where they can learn about preparing themselves for the baby’s arrival. They can also learn other important services that they would require in future to take care of the baby.

Preparing For the Upcoming Changes

Remember, your life is going to become completely different when your little one arrives. You have to be all prepared for the midnight feedings, nappy changing, cleaning, proper child care, and restricted social life for the first few months.

Enjoying the Journey of Parenthood

We understand that you do not have the first-hand pregnancy experience, but the 9 months get before the baby’s arrival are adequate for you to mentally prepare yourself. We advise intended parents to get involved with the surrogate’s pregnancy to feel the excitement of moving ahead to become parents. You can arrange for a baby shower and overall those prenatal care for the surrogate that you would have done for yourself. This will give you a realistic experience of the pregnancy and help you get attached to the baby.

Going With the Flow

You have to be flexible to the idea of becoming parents through surrogacy. You need to adapt yourself to a parenting style. There would be a lot of challenges coming in your way no matter how much you prepare yourself. You have to be patiently handling all the situations coming your way. Things might not turn out the way you have planned. You have come a long way ever since you chose surrogacy as a means of bringing your little bundle of joy home. So, you have to show your strength in every difficulty that you might face when raising your baby.

Let Your Baby Know About How She Has Been Brought Into This World

Many parents find it uncomfortable to discuss the conception and birth details with their children born out of surrogacy. There are a lot of medical, social, emotional, and legal complexities related to surrogacy. Parents can find it overwhelming to begin a conversation with their children on this subject.

As per IVF experts and counsellors, it is important for every child born out of surgery to know about their story. Parents should be honest with their children and tell them their surrogacy story. This is a very natural process and should be done without any ornamentation of words.

Talking to the Child About Surrogacy

Well, there are many reasons why it is important for every intended parent to talk openly and honestly to their child about their surrogacy history. As per The American Society of Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) Ethics Committee, keeping any secrecy regarding the child’s origin can bring negative consequences for the child as well as the parents in the future. Experts and psychologists in this field have advocated the child’s right to know about its origin to develop a sense of identity and self-esteem in them.

How to Tell the Child about Its Surrogacy Story

Even after recognizing the importance of letting the child know about the surrogacy history, it can be hard to approach the topic. Most of the parents wait for the right time to talk to their child about the procedure used to bring them into this world. As a matter of fact, waiting too long to tell the child the story might bring unwanted consequences in life. Being a surrogacy expert for quite some time now, we recommend talking about surrogacy with your child in an open-minded manner. You can talk to the young child and let him know about her birth story instead of waiting for the child to reach a certain age. This lays the foundation of belief and trust in them as they already are aware of their unique birth from no one else but their parents. In case you delay the conversation for longer, they might come to know about it from someone else. Such incidents can influence a child’s mind and she can have trust issues with her parents in future due to this.

You have walked the long way from being an intended parent to real parents. You have experience in details all the minute procedures involved in the surrogacy. So, while telling your child about its surrogacy origin, you can use all those details as you tell the story. Collect the pictures of the surrogate who has carried your baby during the gestation, the nurses and medical team that have assisted you throughout the surrogacy procedure, and the nursery she has stayed in before coming home. In fact, it would be great if you create a Scrapbook for her that would contain all these people’s pictures and messages for her. You can also make an audio and visual presentation for your child so she can actually see the process and the people who were involved in her creation.

Your friends and family members can also accompany you in preparing for a small ceremony to let the little one know about the difficulties that her parents have faced to bring her to this world. Begin to tell your child about her surrogacy history while she is an infant. She might not understand the entire process and all those things that you tell her during this time but she can relate to all this information as she grows old enough to understand the procedure. It is important to make it a regular habit to talk about the surrogacy so that she remembers them as she grows up.